Lion of the Blogosphere

Selected readings from Elliot’s 18th year

Page 62, when Elliot is 18, after he has graduated from high school. Soumaya kicks him out of his father’s house.

Soumaya returned from Morocco, and she was very angry with me due to the way I acted while I was there. She effectively kicked me out of father’s house, and because I was eighteen, she was allowed to. Father didn’t do anything to stop her, being the weak man that he is. This is how it has always been. Father has always given Soumaya free reign to impose her rules on the household. He gave her all the power.

This act officially ended the one week-one week arrangement, and mother’s house became my permanent living place.

Not only did she kick me out of father’s house, but she forbade me to go there even for a short visit. And still, father didn’t do anything about it. Father kept saying that the house is her house as much as his, and that she has the right to kick me out. No! I am the eldest son! The house should be MY house before hers! This caused any respect I still had for my father to fade away completely. It was such a betrayal, to put his second wife before his eldest son. What kind of father would do that? The bitch must be really good to him in bed, I figured. What a weak man.

Page 63, a few months later. Elliot is still kicked out of the house, but he is allowed to visit occasionally, and his father teaches him how to drive.

Soumaya’s grudge against me lessened after a couple of months, and she allowed me to go to father’s house for dinner occasionally. I was very angry with father, but I hid my anger. I still needed him.

Father began teaching me how to drive once I received my driver’s permit, which was quite hard to get. I had to take a written test with many questions, and I failed it on my first try. On the second attempt, I managed to pass.

Page 65, Elliot drops his one class at Pierce “College”.

My time at Pierce College became more miserable each day I went there. I despised having to take the bus. It was embarrassing and stressful, and it sucked all of the pride out of me. And for what? To go to one class where I didn’t talk to anyone? There was no point in it anymore. I couldn’t stand the feeling of loneliness I had there. No one wanted to be my friend. It just wasn’t worth the trouble. I decided to drop my class.

Page 67, this is the January after Elliot has graduated from high school.

My mother carried on pressuring me to get a job, and she would never leave me alone about it. She was a bit frustrated that I wasn’t getting one. The two of us had a lot of arguments, and living with my mother became an extreme hassle.

After signing me up to a program in the regional center, my mother found a life coach to counsel me and help me find a job. This life coach’s name was Tony, a boisterous 40 year old man who came to meet me every other week. I was open to going along with this. I had plenty of free time, and I was so lonely that any social interaction was welcome. For our meetings, Tony usually took me out to lunch somewhere in the Valley, where he gave me advice on socializing and self-improvement.

I continued searching for a job, but I still wasn’t able to find one. I refused all of the jobs that Tony suggested to me. The problem was that most of the jobs that were available to me at the time were jobs I considered to be beneath me. My mother wanted me to get a simple retail job, and the thought of myself doing that was mortifying. It would be completely against my character. I am an intellectual who is destined for greatness. I would never perform a low-class service job.

It’s not surprising that his mother didn’t want to just have Elliot sit around her house all the time. Although the paragraph above makes it sound like Elliot is just too lazy to work, I think that he probably also suffered too much social anxiety to go on a job interview, even for a retail job.

Tony is one of many “coaches” that Elliot had, but none of his coaches were able to help him very much.

Then, Elliot’s father gets Elliot a job with a friend, which actually seems like it was a good experience for Elliot:

My father told me that I could work for his friend Karl Champley for a few weeks, to help him build a staircase in his new house. I knew Karl quite well, for he used to come over to father’s for dinner occasionally. Karl was just finishing up building his new house in Woodland Hills, just a few minutes away from father’s house, and he offered to hire me to help with the staircase.

I agreed to take this job. Sure, construction work was lowly and laborious, but this was different. This was more like assisting a friend, and it would be in a private environment. It was the perfect temporary job opportunity, and it would most definitely get my mother off my back. I still wasn’t able to drive, so I rode my bicycle there from mother’s house every morning. The trip on the bicycle took 30 minutes. It was grueling to ride a bicycle up that steep winding road every day, but it provided good exercise, which I was in need of. I worked with Karl every weekday for about three weeks. It turned out to be quite a pleasant experience. Karl was very friendly and I enjoyed working with him. When we finished the staircase, which was a spiral staircase that led up to his roof-deck, we took a moment to admire the work we did.

But then, Elliot has another run-in with Soumaya and is kicked out of the house again:

On my last day working for Karl, I decided to stop by at father’s house to have a drink. I was quite parched from the bicycle ride. I entered the house without knocking because I believed I had the right to. As the eldest son, the house should be my house after my father. Soumaya was surprised to see me, and she got angry that I didn’t knock. To teach me a lesson, she ordered me to go back outside and knock. I refused, telling her that she has no right to order me around anymore. I then helped myself to a glass of water. Soumaya knocked the glass of water out of my hand and it shattered on the floor. Father clamored angrily up the stairs from his office demanding to know what was going on. The three of us had a heated argument, and of course father took Soumaya’s side. They both kicked me out of the house, telling me that I’m not to return. I felt betrayed and humiliated as I furiously made my way back to mother’s house. At that very moment, I hated both of them, and I wouldn’t see either of them for many months. For those months, my father was dead to me. My mother was all I had left in this bleak world.

Soumaya sure sounds like a real bitch based on the way Elliot describes her. Will we ever hear her side of the story?

Written by Lion of the Blogosphere

May 30, 2014 at 8:49 PM

Posted in Psychology

38 Responses

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  1. “Soumaya sure sounds like a real bitch based on the way Elliot describes her. ”

    Yes, Elliot was obviously such a nice and well adjusted young man. She must’ve been a real bitch for not wanting him around.

    Hepp

    May 30, 2014 at 8:52 PM

    • Well according to all descriptions, he was quiet and non-threatening.

      • Sure, when he wasn’t throwing coffee at people for kissing in Starbucks, starting a fight with a full blooded Asian for talking to a blonde girl, or fantasizing about exterminating humanity for having sex. And that’s just from his side of the story.

        Hepp

        May 30, 2014 at 9:58 PM

  2. The way he talks about his one class confirms the view of him seeing school as a social experience, not as a place where you learn.

    Ava Lon

    May 30, 2014 at 8:56 PM

    • I’ve noticed the same thing. If he was a real “intellectual”, as he claimed in his manifesto, he wouldn’t be so obsessed with his “social life,” and would be more focused on his schoolwork. I thought it was funny how throughout his document he seemed little interested in discussing his actual schoolwork, mostly wanting to prattle on about having no friends and being jealous of others.

      Live-Evil

      May 30, 2014 at 10:43 PM

      • If he was a real “intellectual”, as he claimed in his manifesto, he wouldn’t be so obsessed with his “social life,” and would be more focused on his schoolwork.

        Except … what’s intellectual about school?

        Glengarry

        May 31, 2014 at 10:26 AM

      • It was never the theme of his autobiography that he was an intellectual. It seems to me like a throwaway self-compliment to try to boos his self-esteem.

        And he IS more of an intellectual than he is an athlete, even though he doesn’t compare to Ivy League intellectuals (or even state school intellectuals).

    • and seeing a social reality above or sub-liminal or whatever… = his social intelligence was not even below average.

      imagine being an ant. imagine being the only ant you know who knows he’s an ant, who knows what it is to be an ant.

      jorge videla

      May 30, 2014 at 11:39 PM

  3. Father began teaching me how to drive once I received my driver’s permit, which was quite hard to get. I had to take a written test with many questions, and I failed it on my first try. On the second attempt, I managed to pass.

    Can’t be too intelligent if he hasn’t mastered the rules of driving by age 18, despite being surrounded by roads and cars his whole life. I estimate his IQ to be whatever the average IQ of an American driver is (somewhat above 100 since a lot of dumb people never even take the test).

    pumpkinperson

    May 30, 2014 at 9:45 PM

    • I failed a written drivers test in Arizona. Because I went in with the attitude that I knew how to drive so it would obviously not require studying beforehand. But it required memorization of facts like “how many days do you have to notify the Department of Motor Vehicles after you have moved” a question that you wouldn’t know the answer to unless you had studied for the test.

      • Good point. The inclusion of such obscure coachable trivia would make it pretty useless as a measure of intelligence.

        pumpkinperson

        May 31, 2014 at 4:04 AM

      • A topic for another day; counter-intuitive government.

        Curle

        May 31, 2014 at 11:42 AM

      • Containing trivia you weren’t aware of is not the same thing as “quite hard”. I doubt you thought getting a permit/license was very difficult.

        J1

        June 1, 2014 at 6:35 PM

  4. His father also doesn’t sound like a very good father, but of course his autobiography is biased. Still, kicking your own son out of the house at the bequest of the second wife does not sound good.
    It is likely that if the father and mother had not divorced, Elliot would grow up less troubled, or at least would have found more family support.
    Then again, Elliot seems to have had ultra-high expectations (“I am an intellectual who is destined for greatness”) combined with total incapacity to deal with the simplest facts of daily life. A pretty bad combination, although not as uncommon as some may think. Maybe one fed on the other, he had to believe in something about himself in order not to feel like a total loser.
    I think if he had grown up in another environment it would also help. Southern California and specially the kind of people he was surrounded by were not the best people to understand him. This is a milieu where extroversion, superficiality, looks, money and status are the only thing that matter, and that was reinforced everyday by his father and stepmother.

    Dumbo

    May 30, 2014 at 9:49 PM

  5. sounds like senior rodger was a whimp.

    jorge videla

    May 30, 2014 at 9:59 PM

    • Not to excuse his neglect of his son, but the way divorce law works, he was probably acting rationally.

      Kyo

      May 31, 2014 at 12:01 AM

  6. “Will we ever hear her side of the story?”

    What do you expect to hear? “Well..I was so completely not a bitch..I have needs and that little [catches her word] sweet child needed to grow up away from his dad”

    L

    May 30, 2014 at 10:25 PM

    • She probably considers him lucky to have escaped a stoning in Morocco.

      Curle

      May 31, 2014 at 11:45 AM

  7. In east asian culture, what Soumaya does would be unheard of and would be interpreted as confrontational and much less self-effacing. Seems Elliot wanted to play both sides of his own identity for his own benefit.

    nevertoolate

    May 30, 2014 at 11:21 PM

  8. “My mother wanted me to get a simple retail job, and the thought of myself doing that was mortifying. It would be completely against my character. I am an intellectual who is destined for greatness. I would never perform a low-class service job. ”

    Just a touch of narcissism there, no?

    Steve Johnson

    May 31, 2014 at 12:35 AM

    • He should be in a real college and studying for a career and not working in a low-wage job. It’s still not clear to me why he was smart enough to write such a good autobiography, but so lacking in academic accomplishment. I’m not saying he’s a geniues, but he’s perfectly capable of graduating from a 4-year state college with good grades. Maybe his high Neuroticism held him back and made it hard for him to study.

      • Well if he’s dropping classes just because there’s a couple in the class, he was probably too angry and jealous to focus academically.

        pumpkinperson

        May 31, 2014 at 11:05 AM

      • I think it was because he was too lazy to study. He wanted everything in life handed to him, and then receive endless praise and flattery for getting it.

        BehindTheLines

        May 31, 2014 at 7:01 PM

  9. Revelatory. In the context of game, and viewing Elliot as the spawn of the chief rival woman to his step mother, all of her unbelievably cunty acts as told by Elliot are essentially weapons-grade shit tests. Does he carry the alpha genes? Can he handle the abuse I heap on him? If not, it’s just proof he was the lesser progeny of a failed coupling. In short, a beta.

    There’s really nothing more to understand. He was dead weight to her. It was incredibly astute that Elliot both identified his father as simultaneously weak and probably utterly enraptured with his wife’s sexual prowess yet couldn’t apply these sobering observations to his own life.

    Patrick

    May 31, 2014 at 2:27 AM

  10. It is good and rational for them to kick him out. He is grown up men, should be able to live on his own.

    MyTwoCents

    May 31, 2014 at 2:47 AM

  11. …Father didn’t do anything to stop her, being the weak man that he is. This is how it has always been. Father has always given Soumaya free reign to impose her rules on the household. He gave her all the power.

    So Elliot was a complete omega who hated his beta father for not being alpha so he dreamed of being an alpha himself.

    This should be an example to all the nerds out there who say women only want alpha males. As I always say women love beta males because they like to be in charge of relationships for the most part.

    They have no interest in omegas and alphas are mainly just a cartoon that nerds cling to as a fantasy ideal.

    Rifleman

    May 31, 2014 at 4:27 AM

  12. I suspect that if his parents had more money and a little more status that Elliot would have ended up your average substance abusing, drop out child of Hollywood. He was caught in the position of wanting the life of a second generation Hollywood failure but without the money.

    superdestroyer

    May 31, 2014 at 5:50 AM

    • His autobiography should have used that in the title “Elliot Rodger; Second Generation Hollywood Failure.”

      Curle

      May 31, 2014 at 11:28 AM

  13. “Soumaya knocked the glass of water out of my hand and it shattered on the floor.”

    As the old expression goes, violence is never the answer, except when it is.
    I’m really wondering how things might have played out if Elliot had snapped at this shameful treatment and introduced Soumaya’s face to his fist. And not some wimpy slap or anything, but REALLY belting him, maybe breaking her jaw or nose or something.
    It’s not beyond the realm of possibility that this experience might really have turned his life around in a positive way. Sure, his cowardly father would have banned him from the house, but deep down he would have had a newfound respect for Elliot. For his part, Elliot would have done something take-charge and assertive for the first time in his life. Just maybe, it would have changed his personality, and in a good way.

    Peter

    ironrailsironweights

    May 31, 2014 at 10:17 AM

    • If she was so openly condescending of him, it means she didn’t fear him. He was non-threatening, and she looked down on him for it.
      If he would’ve slugged her, she would have never saw it coming.
      It could have gone both ways — Soumaya would have either: 1) Been stunned into shocked silence and terror, never to harass him so viciously again, or, 2) she would have raised hell and called the police.

      Either way, had he smashed her face that day, he would have learned that women aren’t all that scary.

      markus

      May 31, 2014 at 11:44 AM

    • Or, he would have got arrested for battery. Then he’d have a felony arrest record, credibility as a bad boy alpha, and would have finally attracted women to have sex with him. And multiple murders and Elliot’s suicide would have been averted.

      E. Rekshun

      May 31, 2014 at 12:38 PM

      • I don’t think he would have done well in jail. He’s a little guy, and the crime of hitting a women just isn’t going to give him a lot of cred in the exercise yard.

        dcanaday

        June 2, 2014 at 7:26 AM

    • Its funny, I view Soumaya (based on Elliotts description) in completely an opposite light. She was the only one who really tried to help him. She forced him to play with the neighborhood kids when he was terrified of doing it and tried to limit his WoW play. His mother/father didn’t seem to care that he was wasting all his time playing that game. Also she wanted to bring home to Morocco for 2/3 months to get him out of his lethargy, if she disliked him so much why would she want him around her and her son at all? She only banned him from the house after his antics on that trip.

      Jake

      May 31, 2014 at 1:41 PM

    • Are you kidding? He would have been arrested and charged and his father would not speak to him. In Amerikur, you never ever hit a woman.

      I think Lion’s doing great work on this – many people feel this way and it needs to be addressed. Unfortunately, most people are plugged into The Matrix and it’s impossible to move them off of “he’s crazy” so we can illuminate the real causes.

      asdf

      May 31, 2014 at 6:46 PM

  14. Evil stepmother syndrome.

    Glengarry

    May 31, 2014 at 10:37 AM

  15. “But among you it will be different. Those who are the greatest among you should take the lowest rank, and the leader should be like a servant.” Luke 22:26.

    So, he was too important to do trivial work like retail.

    Religion sometimes gets a bad rap on this site but one wonders what the addition of organized religion would have done to move Elliot’s behavior in a more positive direction.

    One doesn’t have to be a big Bible thumper (or Torah thumper for that matter) to internalize tidbits like the above over the course of a childhood full of once per week sermons.

    Curle

    May 31, 2014 at 11:20 AM

  16. Is anybody else wondering if Peter Rodger and Soumaya are going to remain married after all this? Spouses will sometimes blame each other after events like this, and Soumaya does come off looking like an uncaring witch in Elliot’s autobiography.

    dcanaday

    June 2, 2014 at 7:31 AM

  17. All stepparents are a danger to the well-being of children and to the relationship between the biological parent and their previous children.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinderella_effect

    Jimmy Dark

    June 4, 2014 at 7:28 AM


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