Lion of the Blogosphere

Anthony Bourdain photo

with 108 comments

At Takashi, an expensive Japanese/Korean restaurant in Manhattan. Anthony Bourdain’s wife, Ottavia Busia, shows off her impressive bicep, while the daughter looks embarrassed [or maybe not embarrassed but imitating a popular dance moving called “dabbing”]. Anthony has a dour look on his face, in contrast with his smiling wife and daughter.

This is September 2016, a few days after the NY Post reported that they had separated.

MORE THOUGHTS

Ottavia was previously a groupie to an Irish rock band and then a chef. Not a great chef, maybe a top 10% chef, but a top 10% chef is still a nobody. Then she met the rich and famous Anthony Bourdain who was 22 years older. So their marriage is a classic case of a wealthy and famous older man being able to marry a much younger woman who would never have given him the time of day were it not for his fame and wealth.

After she gave birth, then she got into fitness and jiu-jitsu and MMA. It’s actually a very common path into fitness and weightlifting for women, they do it in response to giving birth. I know this from browsing around Instagram. You can learn a lot from Instagram.

There is a line of thinking in the comments that I will try to elucidate a little better: After Ottavia joins this MMA and bodybuilding culture, she hangs out with a lot of men in the gym who are ‘roided up monsters who physically put Anthony Bourdain to shame, and even though he was in great shape for a chef in his early 60s, he was nothing compared to the type of guys in the MMA gyms. And thus Ottavia came to see him as less manly.

Anthony tries to get into jiu-jitsu to make his wife happy and so the jiu-jitsu could be a family thing (the daughter is also training in it), but I guess it wasn’t enough.

Some commenters, think that Bourdain is not really an alpha, but a greater beta who accidentally became rich and famous and thus alpha on account of his new status, but still deep-down is not alpha. I’m not sure I buy that.

Written by Lion of the Blogosphere

June 11, 2018 at EDT am

Posted in Obituary

108 Responses

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  1. Bourdain was supposedly having suicidal thoughts right after his first divorce. My guess is that when he had his second relationship, she alleviated his thoughts, but they came back even more when his second relationship was going on the rocks.

    Red pill aspie

    June 11, 2018 at EDT am

    • that’s what he said, but he was just telling a story. the best explanation of all the facts is that he didn’t commit suicide.

      wise leader kim jong un

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • For that, I’m taking down and rolling up a propaganda poster of your image.

        Red pill aspie

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  2. The daughter is “dabbing”. She’s not embarassed.

    Alex

    June 11, 2018 at EDT am

    • Thank you, I obviously need to spend more time following popular culture.

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • No you don’t. Dabbing is the moonwalk of the millenial generation.

        Half Canadian

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • If he’s going to make comments like he did and not look like a fool then he does need to know more about popular culture.

        Magnavox

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  3. Not embarrassed. She’s dabbing. It’s something the White kids picked up a few years ago from the Black kids.

    Gmanifesto

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Thank you, I obviously need to spend more time following popular culture.

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Apparently, “dabbing” is a reference to a technique used to get particularly high off of marijuana. It was popularized by a colored football player as a celebration move. A Saudi performer who was arrested for it a while back. I don’t know that it should be illegal but I think it should be censored on television and come with a fine.

      My impression is that a lot of people imitate blacks to be funny. I sometimes do as parody. But the humor and “coolness” are in the satire. The problem is when people are too dumb to realize it and start taking their idiocy seriously. Ghetto drift is worse than prole drift because it glorifies ignorance and immorality.

      destructure

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • I agree with you. It should also be noted that most rap songs white people like feature black men behaving stupid and undignified in a relatively non-threatening way. The nastier stuff is consumed mostly by black people themselves. One of my favorite rap songs is “Grillz” by Nelly. It’s just funny listening to grown men talk about how important it is to decorate your teeth with gold and diamonds.

        Stealth

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  4. He made very foolish decisions with regards to women. He was trying to settle down and start a family late in life after finally becoming successful (which is fine) but he was still choosing the same class of woman that the 20 year old, strung out drug user just looking for casual sex and a good time version of himself would have gone after. n

    PerezHBD

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Just going by the pictures of her, I would have to agree. She looks like she is a lot of fun in bed, but you marry a woman who is going to be a devoted mother and not cling to her lost youth.

      I’d be willing to bet she’s had sex with at least one of the guys in that photo with her.

      fortaleza84

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • I’m familiar with the guys in that pic as I used to train with guys from Renzo’s club, and it’s a guarantee that she banged not only the guys in that pic but several other high level competitors from the club. it was an open secret.

        Dave

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Today, Rose McGowan is claiming the he and Argento had an open relationship, but usually it is more open for one than the other.

      markpower49

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Dave Pinsen

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Is that young man an alpha for dating her?

        Some commenters think he’s an alpha with an older woman.

        A man involved with an older woman is fool from a biological and status viewpoint.

        JS

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • Yeah, he clearly fucked up on the wife part. He’s definitely not an Alpha if he couldn’t rein that shit in. Obviously the one Instagram photo taken with the two fighters was right before the gang-bang. If you’re going to mess around with high-charging, high T women and sire them with your offspring, you better know how to keep them in line, otherwise they’ll walk all over you. Apparently he didn’t, but I don’t blame him, for most men the effort is really not worth it.

      DdR

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • You get high T men with these high T broads who just don’t care that they cheat. Very common with high prole military. They all fuck each other’s wives. But nobody really cares. Why a sensitive artiste like Booredane would think that’s his milieu is a bit puzzling.

        bobbybobbob

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • You’re right. Bourdain had a lot of female fans, he could have done much better than Ottavia or Asia. The fact that he seemed to gravitate to strung out, tough looking women speaks to something.

      Peter Akuleyev

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  5. Review of the record indicates that AB — who seemed to be “Alpha as fuck, ZFG” — was a Greater Beta casualty, done in at last by one-itis for an Italian celebrity hoo-ah. Guy could have had a girl in every city ’round the world, but apparently that’s not what his soul really was. He faked-it-until-he-maked-it, until he couldn’t anymore.

    Bigger picture message: People, please do not make excuses for suicides such as his. It only encourages the people on the edge to want everyone boohooing over them. Suicide – self-murder – is violence against loved ones, the same as if someone else had murdered you. I am sure some close to AB are in fact angry at him, not praising him, but they are not allowed to say so publicly.

    Pentheus

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Your implications raise some interesting questions. Do alphas ever commit suicide? Do you think he was really a ZFG kind of person? Or do you think, deep down, stuff really bothered him? I suppose someone could be a ZFG person most of the time and still suffer bouts of depression.

      You raise another interesting question by implication; regarding alphas and oneitis. Are alphas necessarily promiscuous? I’d agree that many guys, given the chance, would be. And, since alphas typically have the chance, many probably are. But are there no alphas with morals and loyalty? After all, the term alpha is derived from wolves where there is both a male and female alpha in the pack. They actually comprise an alpha pair and are strictly monogamous i.e. oneitis.

      destructure

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • There’s r-Alphas and K-Alphas.

        r-Alphas are flashy and smooth, but always favor quantity over quality and rarely pay much attention to their kids, e.g. rock stars

        K-Alphas choose an ideal mate and produce many healthy, well adjusted children.

        Mr. Frosty

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  6. There’s a clip on youtube from the ‘rome’ episode of his show where he first met asia argento. They’re chatting at a restaurant and he’s clearly smitten. She was behaving kind of brash and nasty (IMHO) but he eats it up like a puppy dog. I guess he had a ‘type.’

    toomanymice

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • She’s right about ignoring the so-called news.

      Curle

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  7. These degenerates were involved in something unholy.

    B.T.D.T.

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Commentors over at Vox Populi think he did it to avoid disgrace and prison for underage sex crimes, with some possible evidence to support that.

      markpower49

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  8. I find overly muscular women to be unattractive.

    ScarletNumber

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • These chix would give any self-respecting man a boner even if he’s dead:

      Peter

      ironrailsironweights

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Lot of them are doing exercises with poor form. They’re going to get injured sooner or later.

        Tarl

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  9. I guess that answers it. All the wealth, fame, and success one can ever wish. All the globetrotting and enjoying all kinds of food. A charmed life that can make anyone ask “what’s the point if he can’t chop it”.

    But when you come home to empty home dealing with an estranged wife all that entails. I can imagine all that wealth and everything can make it feel even worse – flipping to feel even more powerless as having all of that means grants him no control over his home life.

    Dreamer

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  10. There is a line of thinking in the comments that I will try to elucidate a little better: After Ottavia joins this MMA and bodybuilding culture, she hangs out with a lot of men in the gym who are ‘roided up monsters who physically put Anthony Bourdain to shame, and even though he was in great shape for a chef in early 60s, he was nothing compared to the type of guys in the MMA gyms. And thus Ottavia came to see him as less manly.

    Anthony tries to get into jiu-jitsu to make his wife happy and so the jiu-jitsu could be a family thing (the daughter is also training in it), but I guess it wasn’t enough.

    This is why in the past men could kill other men hanging around their wives, could challenge other men to duels, could beat their women, etc. If Bourdain had taken his chef’s knife and turned one of these MMA types hanging around his wife into mincemeat, his wife wouldn’t have been attracted to the MMA guy anymore. Women aren’t attracted to rotting mincemeat, no matter how muscly or handsome they might have been. But Bourdain can’t do that, because the full force of the government will come down on him and prosecute him, so he ends up just looking like a pathetic weak cuck in the eyes of his wife’s and women’s instincts.

    Tom

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Chances are high you own a katana and wear a fedora.

      ibejeph

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • He makes a valid point, though. There are no legal consequences for either adultery or going after someone’s spouse.

        destructure

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • “He makes a valid point, though. There are no legal consequences for either adultery or going after someone’s spouse.”

        There was a line in The Postman Always Rings Twice, if I remember the book, that goes– steal a man’s car that’s larceny, steal a man’s wife that’s nothing.

        ttgy1

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • >But Bourdain can’t do that, because the full force of the government will come down on him and prosecute him

      That and that these guys spend all their time practicing hand to hand combat.

      Good plan otherwise.

      Steve Johnson

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • +1

      Hwite

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Yeah, as much of a spazz as Roissy is, he made a good point about wives who spend time with other men. If she’s in regular contact with desirable men, it’s a recipe for big problems.

      fortaleza84

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  11. It’s likely that his newfound feminism (another commenter mentioned the Weinstein / metoo thing) was enough to repulse his actress girlfriend Asia Argento. Someone posted that she was hanging around a younger reporter shortly before Bourdain’s suicide.

    Coincidentally, Argento played a prostitute in Abel Ferrara’ s “New Rose Hotel” and her father cast her in a role for which she went nude in a movie aptly named “Trauma”. To say the least, the Argentos don’t seem normal.

    Anon

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  12. I wasn’t a huge fan of Bourdain’s for among reasons, his incessant baiting of vegetarians and animal rights people, but superficially at least he appeared to lead a charmed life. Yes there were the past drug abuses, but up until the moment of his death, he came across as a super successful media personality who had enough self-awareness never to get caught up in his own self-hype. He was also effortlessly witty, and masterful in the use of sardonic humour, without ever crossing the line into trite hipsterish irony. From everything I’ve read now since his passing, he was obviously a very unhappy man, who had lead a life chock full of very bad personal decisions, not least amongst them his romantic relationships. If you traced the trajectory of his life, his suicide came as no surprise, at least not in hindsight.

    Roli

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • his incessant baiting of vegetarians and animal rights people

      Heh heh that’s the only thing I’ve heard about him so far that makes me like him better.

      Tarl

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  13. Check out this commenter post at iSteve:

    My cousin sister is a White woman born and raised in Iowa , married to an Arab boyfriend. They live in Paris. She is 27 and he is 32. They have 4 kids and 5th is on the way(they are so cute). He is an alpha male and very rich. He is 6 feet 4 inches tall and as far as “Whiteness” is concerned , he looks more White than most of the Portuguese, Spaniards , Italians and Greeks. He loves hunting and has shot a lot of big game in Africa and has also killed a few Tigers in India illegally.
    You know what , He is an Alpha Male unlike most of the White Pajama Boys in the West. He was educated in UCLA and is a Successful Entrepreneur. He doesn’t smoke or do drugs.
    He is a person with whom a Woman wants to pass on her genes not the Beta Male CUCKSERVATIVES.
    White beta “man” cannot compete with other Men of Color in the sexual marketplace. A few Arab men are strong, creative disciplined and athletic.

    Marty

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • The person who wrote that made it up because they were pissed off. It’s very obvious. Even if the comment weren’t over the top, the first three words gives it away: “My cousin sister”. No one would say that. They would simply say “My cousin” because their cousin’s sister would also be their cousin. One would only say it the other way if it was fabricated.

      destructure

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • “My cousin sister”

      He couldn’t make up his mind when he was inventing that story.

      Alexander Turok

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • “He couldn’t make up his mind when he was inventing that story.”

        This was a very amusing comment.

        ice hole

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Yeah, the story does sound made up. Either a straight up troll; or an Arab man sharing his fantasy; or a white guy trying to rabble rouse.

        fortaleza84

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  14. Some commenters, think that Bourdain is not really an alpha, but a greater beta who accidentally became rich and famous and thus alpha on account of his new status, but still deep-down is not alpha. I’m not sure I buy that.

    These terms are infamously fuzzy, and increasingly meaningless. As I recall, Roissy used to say an alpha was anyone who triggered tingles from hot, young women, so naturally I gave him a lot of shit for claiming Kurt Cobain was alpha (talk about someone who ascended the hierarchy by being in the right place at the right time).

    I do not know enough about Bourdain to say he got lucky, but he’s seemed to enjoy success in a number of different areas for a rather long time.This suggests he did not necessarily enjoy any special fortune.

    When I was visiting my father last year, a promo for Bourdain’s show came on and he said, “That’s my dream job” — because you get to travel the world eating food. Travel, however, puts a huge strain on relationships, especially when both partners are sexually desirable. Sure, he could’ve had a girl in every city, but not all men want that lifestyle. There are people who become rich and still refuse to upgrade their housing and transportation. If anything, it reflects a more mature view about the world.

    Vince

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  15. This whole alpha/beta thing is blown out of proportion. Going by the standards of the dissident right only about .001% of men would be alpha. And they all have to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger and have the libido of Bill Clinton. This idea that alphas have to be disloyal jerks is nonsense. Take a physically fit man who honors God, is loyal to his wife,family and country and who builds legacy wealth. He may have the opportunity to cheat on his wife or blow all his money but he doesn’t because he is honorable. That is an alpha as I see it. The notion that an alpha male needs to be a reckless and irresponsible cad is foolish.

    B.T.D.T.

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Agreed these labels are at best misapplied and at worst meaningless.

      fwiw I get a very strong creepy vibe from bourdain. This is why I never watched his shows despite loving the genre. Maybe he was different in person or in writing.

      Can alphas be creepy? I dunno.

      toomanymice

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • “alpha” is code form black.

      wise leader kim jong un

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  16. Bourdain’s ex-wife is nothing to write home about — and that’s putting it mildly — nor is the girlfriend or ex-girlfriend Asia Argento. He never really outgrew the type of androgynous bitchy nympho he went for in his younger days. Actually, he never really outgrew his younger days, period. You know what they say: grow up, or don’t grow old.

    I guess he chose the latter.

    ice hole

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Ottavia looks cute in a bitchy Jewish kind of way, and Asia just looks kind of weird and full of ugly tattoos, but has a good body.

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  17. Here’s an article about Bourdain’s 11 year-old daughter performing at some asinine rock venue a few days after her father’s death:

    https://pagesix.com/2018/06/11/anthony-bourdains-ex-wife-shares-photo-of-strong-and-brave-daughter/?_ga=2.6161011.1160596802.1525232640-1002734496.1525232640

    What kind of mother does this, then posts photos of her “strong and brave” daughter? Really, these people are beyond trash.

    ice hole

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • That’s how I found the Instagram account in the first place, but I found the Ottavia jiu-jitsu angle more interesting. The Jews “sit shiva” for a week after a parent dies.

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  18. I still believe he offed himself after having his second lover in a row cheat on him publicly. But did Chantix have anything to do with it?
    https://www.mediaite.com/tv/anthony-bourdain-took-chantix-the-side-effects-of-which-are-suicidal-thoughts-will-cable-news-give-a-major-advertiser-a-pass/

    Baron

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  19. why are you all so sure it was suicide and not autoerotic asphyxiation?

    wise leader kim jong un

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  20. the smirk he’s giving is a joke.

    wise leader kim jong un

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • the smirk he’s giving is a joke.

      Kim Jong Un is live blogging the Singapore summit on Lion’s blog?

      The Undiscovered Jew

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • My impression as well.

      Steverino@steverino.com

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  21. Any man who approves of abortion is not acting like an alpha regardless of weather he is one or not. Women do not have a right to abort without society’s consent. This is how they get chutzpah and develop all these extreme feminist views. And then you get all these problems of incels, gays and lesbians because the fabric of society gets all messed up.

    My aunt was married to a goy. Now this goy was a Physics PHD and the nicest guy you can think off. I really liked him as a kid. After the divorce he came out and he said that my aunt had made him gay. She was really mad about him saying it, but I think it’s true. He was, normal, had a kid, divorced and became gay. What gives? I’m telling you it was her. She was a big feminist. Now women, they need to have their rights respected, but shouldn’t be allowed to kill kids and run around half-naked. Think, if you let her kill your kid, why is she ever gonna respect you?

    Yakov

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • What if you date a black chick and she gets pregnant? The obvious answer is don’t date black women but what if there are no better options available? I think abortion is fine for non-whites. I don’t agree with abortion because I think it is murder. What is worse, abortion or killing people in a race war because the blacks quickly out-bred white Americans? They say without abortion the number of blacks in this country would be nearly twice as many.

      NotWesley

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • without abortion and prison it would be 4x as many.

        wise leader kim jong un

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • So you want to impregnate black women and abort the fetuses? You are a monster, sir! Lion, sterilize this man!

        Yakov

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Now obviously this issue isn’t black and white and I’m laying out the ideological foundation here. In real life planned parenthood has its place and I’m not suggesting to defund it. It’s not an a priori choice, however.

        Yakov

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Lion, sterilize this man!

        No need to worry this guy (or similar) have any chance of having offspring.

        If the “redpillers” (now “black” pillers) had any chance of reproducing at some point, that time has passed.

        Most black pill aficionados are not only permanently incel but are, at most, one or two synaptic malfunctions from shooting up a high school.

        The Undiscovered Jew

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Yes but who is “society”? As we’ve come learn, society = HLS grads. I

      Marty

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Can you be alpha if you support a man’s right to force a woman to abort his child?

      Magnavox

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Magna, Magna, what happened to your reasoning faculties? What is the legal basis for the ownership? If the child isn’t woman’s, it isn’t man’s either. You think you own your kids or something and you can just kill them off?

        Yakov

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • If abortion creates feminism, than, how, Yakov, do you explain the fact that Russia is so much less feminist than the West? Abortion on demand was the primary means of birth control in the USSR and is still widely practiced in Russia.

      Peter Akuleyev

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Western women undego abortions because they feel empowered and confident about their futures.

        Russian women undego abortions because they feel disempowered and dread the future.

        njguy73

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Russians, for cultural reasons, don’t like using birth control or don’t have it available. Russia is less feminist, but not less slutty than the west.

        Yakov

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  22. I despise people like Bourdain. He represents this whole class of people who think drugs and sex are edgy and nihilistic “cause nothin matters man” said in stoner voice. Fuck these people and Bourdain who glamorize this garbage.
    “muh demons guise”
    “muh emotional pain”
    What I don’t understand about America is why so many people do drugs and drugs on the job. It’s like the immigration creates this negative feedback loop of hypercomptetition that grinds people down to nothing. Nothing good can emerge from a society like this.

    NotWesley

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • the iron law of wages is a law as long as the ruling class wish it to be. it’s another contradiction of capitalism. and the american ruling class does so wish. s&p 500 profitability (profits as % of revenues) is at an all time high, about $32,500 per employee of s&p 500 companies after tax. the s&p 500 employs about 17% of american workers.

      what bourdain should’ve said was:

      to day i consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth. i might’ve been given a bad break, but i’ve got an awful lot to live for.

      wise leader kim jong un

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • The drinking culture at colleges is ridiculous too, What does drinking have to do with school or for that matter concerts. How many people have to get drunk or high at a concert? I don’t really get it.

      ttgy1

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • NotWesley, ttgy1 – people like to get blitzed. Stoned. Shitfaced. Why? To not have to deal with their lives.

        njguy73

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Music stimulates drinking. Well documented. Music and tantalizing women really stimulate drinking.

        Curle

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  23. Ottavia is kinda hot. Her stomach is amazing. Takes a lot of dedication to get a stomach like that, from dieting to regular, vigorous exercise. The fact that she is a mother too adds to the difficulty.

    She was probably getting hit on a lot, or at least flirted with. Regular exercise also increases your libido. When your partner is old, wrinkly and always traveling…I can understand her dilemma.

    ibejeph

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • The photo of his wife with two dudes is telling. It looks like a post-coitus snap. He should of murdered the two “trainers” who just teamed up on his wife instead of himself.

      If you are wealthy or famous, if you get married it would be advisable to have the spouse sign a prenup. I’m sure his widow will it be grieving for long.

      I feel bad for his daughter.

      Ivanthegrozny

      June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • The Gracie clan is an amazing bunch, a strong candidate as the world’s leading sports family. Helio, the patriarch who lived until his mid-90’s, basically created Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and inspired modern MMA. He had more than 20 children and most of them have carried on the family legacy.
        I really doubt that’s a post-coitus photo.

        Peter

        ironrailsironweights

        June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

      • “If you are wealthy or famous, if you get married it would be advisable to have the spouse sign a prenup”

        I agree, but that won’t protect you from the heartache and shame of being betrayed by someone you care about. And the fact is that if your wife is somewhat attractive; has a high sex drive; has regular contact with desirable men; and is in a social situation where female infidelity and divorce are common, the chances that she will cheat on you are extremely high. To make matters worse, if a wife cheats on her husband and gets away with it, she will lose respect for him and then stop loving him.

        So I think that in addition to a prenup, if you genuinely care about the woman, you need to take additional steps, such as (1) keeping her barefoot and pregnant; (2) live in an area where divorce is stigmatized; (3) forbid her from engaging in activities like martial arts. Admittedly, this is all easier said than done, but still.

        fortaleza84

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • “Ottavia is kinda hot. Her stomach is amazing. Takes a lot of dedication to get a stomach like that, from dieting to regular, vigorous exercise. The fact that she is a mother too adds to the difficulty.”

      That look was accomplished with PEDs. I promise you. Still takes some discipline, of course.

      anon

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • “Ottavia is kinda hot. Her stomach is amazing.”

      Generational difference, or something. I find a stomach like that on a woman vaguely repulsive, and I’m not particularly taken with it on guy. It looks like the creature from Alien is about to come popping out of her abdominal cavity. Not for me, thanks.

      ice hole

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Screams obsessive show off to me.

        Curle

        June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  24. I think one point that’s being overlooked is how joining MMA could diminish her attraction not by the fact that he compares unfavorably with younger, stronger males, but that she might feel SHE could beat HIM up. A lot of women will not care for a man who is less educated, makes less men, or is shorter.

    Lots of women who get into bodybuilding and MMA are with men who are smaller than other roided up men. That’s OK. What’s not OK is if she’s stronger (or thinks she is). Generally speaking.

    Vince

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Ok or not, you are much better off if your woman does Zumba. In fact, I would say this is an area where the Muslims and Orthodox Jews have it right: A married woman should not have contact with men who are not family members.

      fortaleza84

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  25. This is September 2016, a few days after the NY Post reported that they had separated.

    What’s most important in marriage is to maintain a public facade no matter how much internal turmoil there is at home.

    The Undiscovered Jew

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  26. It’s actually a very common path into fitness and weightlifting for women, they do it in response to giving birth. I know this from browsing around Instagram. You can learn a lot from Instagram.

    This is quite true – it does sound like you’ve been learning a lot from Instagram!

    Having borne multiple multiple children by now, I have observed the ebb-and-flow evolution of my wife’s body with considerable interest, often marveling at the women who manage to bear 3, 4 or more children and still remain rail-thin. I realized at some point that what it comes down to is social pressure and the innate self-consciousness that many (but not all) women feel very acutely, so that it’s exactly as you say: a woman who fears getting (or staying) fat through pregnancy will often make a mega-lifestyle change in order to stave it off.

    SJ, Esquire

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

    • Having borne multiple multiple children by now, I

      Dangling participle FTW!

      Anyway, your point reminds me of a girl I knew when I was in residency. I knew her through church and she was a master’s student at the local music conservatory. Very cute face and nice personality and she actually didn’t look overweight, seemed well-proportioned, but she just had one of those full-figured builds that made it impossible for her to look truly thin. I think she liked me for a brief time and thus I could have asked her out, but I took a pass because, even though she looked pretty good at the time, I was worried she’d pork out after pregnancy or later in life. Soon enough, some guy she’d known in undergrad reconnected with her on social media, and they began dating and got married (presumably he’d had oneitis for her all that time, because she later posted some cutesy story about how he’d asked her out freshman year of college and she said no, but remained “friends.”) Well, I can still see her social media photos, and 8 years and 2 babies later… she looks exactly the same. She’s even got the classic pregnancy profile photos where it looks like she just has a basketball under her dress–the rest of her body, other than her abdomen, completely unaffected. And after giving birth, she apparently has no residual effects (at least, none visible while clothed) and looks the same as when I first met her 8 years ago. So, her husband, who was willing to take a chance, or just didn’t care, has a beautiful wife and 2 kids, while I’m still single and childless.

      Hermes

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

      • Dangling participle FTW!

        Heh, the internet has been savage on my English skillz. And to think, I, a sometime language Nazi! I still loathe improper grammar and style under most circumstances.

        SJ, Esquire

        June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

  27. “It’s actually a very common path into fitness and weightlifting for women, they do it in response to giving birth. I know this from browsing around Instagram. You can learn a lot from Instagram.”

    I’m sure to some extent, most commercials gyms offer child care, but I’ve never seen any statistics one way or another. Anecdotally, most of the women I see at the gym look on the young side to have children, but that’s just anecdotal.
    What you see on Instagram is anecdotal to the max.

    Peter

    ironrailsironweights

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  28. I’ve met Bourdain in person (and his ex-wife seen here). He seemed like he was fairly “alpha”.

    JayMan

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  29. I wouldn’t pay $50 or more to sit in that dingy Japanese restaurant to grill flesh. Bourdain was a loser with bad life choices, as he was being ripped off at the restaurant with his poor mate selection. Individuals who make poor life choices shouldn’t produce children so they can suffer from their consequences.

    JS

    June 11, 2018 at EDT pm

  30. Lion,

    Watching this recent video may change your mind about Asia Argento’s looks.

    For a woman in her 40s, she’s top of the line.

    (The band, named Indochine, is one of France’s most popular and longest-lived rock bands.)

    JA

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  31. He looks like a masochistic guy a likes to be cuckolded . She looks like a sadistic bitch who likes to cuckold an older guy with young stupid alpha. Poor chef ….

    Bruno

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  32. ResetEra and DKos are worried about the Trump Kim summit.

    I really don’t think anything is going to come out of all this and even if Trump does work out a deal with NK it isn’t going to make any kind of a difference in 2020. But it would be nice to have another thing to shove in the Left’s face.

    Otis the Sweaty

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • This shows how topsy-turvy the world is. Trump is basically following the Noam Chomsky playbook with regards to North Korea. If he succeeds it will be by following a course of action the far left has supported for years and spitting on conservative pieties, as well as the formerly common sense idea that you don’t negotiate with Communist dictators. But you’re right – the left will condemn him and the right will celebrate. Trump, if nothing else, is demonstrating that politics are purely tribal, and all ideologies and dogma are just uniforms to keep the tribe together.

      Peter Akuleyev

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  33. soon to be banned troll on ResetEra says this about Trump at the summit:

    “Watching the live stream … makes me feel he actually can talk his way through the mainstream media quite well, he can really combat them well (all of them at the same time in fact). Impressive. Other than a small handful of media outlets, I think the whole world is against him and he is doing pretty well. He doesn’t need a teleprompter or script like the previous Presidents too.”

    Otis the Sweaty

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  34. Some comments on comments:

    Markpower49, Dave Pinsen, Anon: Yes, this.

    Lion/Destructure: I would argue it is categorical that a true Alpha would never commit suicide over one-itis for a known celebrity party girl. By this they are known or unmasked. An Alpha can be self-destructive (e.g., Jim Morrison), but not off himself over a girl. This is not a “no true Scotsman” argument, but is definitional. Such as, we don’t know who is truly “brave” until they are faced suddenly with real danger. “Alpha/Beta” ultimately are internal states; the notches are the RESULT of these internal states. Sociopathic indifference being one of these, which is the opposite of suicide over a girl.

    Another complication with the Alpha/Beta binary wrt committed relationships is that commitment and then marriage are inherently Beta-tizing. They take away the Alpha’s powers innately; he can not disappear for days, for example. “Dread game” is in reality not so available once a guy has a kid.

    Also, in my observations Alphas often make fucked up decisions as to whom they decide to marry. I know a number of guys who were master PUAs with top shelf notches, but they all married not-hot, bitchy wives, had no control over raising the kids, and their lives were thereafter a misery.

    Restructure: No, all Alphas are not promiscuous. I do not think Alphas are hornier or sex-minded than normal guys. Indeed from my experience of various friends I think they are often less so than Betas. It’s just that by definition they have opportunities throwing themselves at them, unlike normal guys. So, how “promiscuous,” or not, would you be if it threw itself at you (vs. going out looking for it on purpose)? Again, Alpha/Beta ultimately is an internal state which manifests itself by certain results in the exterior world. Some people view this backwards, hence leading to much confusion. I guess the takeaway would be, IMO externally it is the sexual opportunities/options which define Alpha, not whether he follows up or even desires it.

    B.T.D.T. (et al.): It doesn’t matter what you think of “these labels.” It doesn’t matter what you think “Alpha really means.” All this has been addressed at great length by Roissy/Heartiste and others. It is one thing to dispute a theory; another not to address what the theory says. “Alpha/Beta” are terms of art, specific to male/female attraction and power dynamics (i.e., who cares more/less). This theory was formulated specifically to answer the very question, “Why are so many successful “leaders of men” so unsuccessful at PUA or relationship dynamics management with women? And why is the contrary true? (Nobodies who attract women in droves.) In fact, the man’s career success only begs that question: “Is she attracted by his money/security/fame, or truly hooked on something about him that she could not quite put into words?”

    Pentheus

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • Losers come from various scenarios.

      I’ve known a few men who married younger women who were divorced and they were also the bread winners.

      Don’t know who is more of a loser, a guy who settles for a divorced younger woman and out earns him, or a guy who settles for a woman with the usual scenario of being a gold digger?

      JS

      June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • My father, who has never worn his wedding ring, and probably cheated my mother, commented about the Bourdain suicide yesterday, “I’ll never understand why a man would kill himself over a woman” — meaning, women are replaceable. He said this at the dinner table while sitting across from my mother.

      Vince

      June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

      • Vince, I am not a bad person, but if I were, the greatest joy in my life would probably be seducing and fucking the wives of shitheads who cheat on their wives. As long as they were fuckable at the time …. And there are millions of people like me, except they are, unlike me, bad people. So I get the cynical attitudes at lots of dinner tables.

        People kill themselves over women because they don’t have the balls to be better men and find better women. Simple as that.

        Of course, the real challenge in life is to be a friend to people who need a friend, to be kind to those who are surprised when someone is kind to them, and to be an enemy of evil people. We read these good instructions in the Book of Proverbs, in the Epistles of Paul, in the works of Maimonides and the works of Alphonsus Liguori (or CS Lewis or Tolkien, if you don’t like reading translations from Hebrew and Italian….)

        howitzer daniel

        June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

  35. Sorry to learn of Bourdain’s marital problems, Lion. I like his show, mostly because I get a kick seeing if he chose places I’ve been to on my travels, and his amusing random philosophizing and bonhomie.

    You know, sometimes independent and accomplished guys will seek or expect mates to be strong as well and that becomes encouraging them to do ‘guy stuff ‘ like-martial arts, fix cars, whatever. That’s fine, but I’ve seen it get out of control and the women turn into what some one called ‘androgynous bitchy nympho’s’…It’s like gals who want their men to be ‘sensitive’ and then it goes too far…this just won’t work for many people.

    What disturbs me is this on-and-off spate of celebrity suicides going back decades often from unlikely-seeming things like hanging themselves from doorknobs and closet bars. Most men would blow their brains out and women slit their wrists. In aggregate, I wonder if foul play from hanging out with the wrong crowd.

    Robert

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  36. “A faction said that the main goal is to attend to oneself with food and drink, which is called pilevin [Yid. < Ger. pflegen], in order to enlarge his limbs [evarim]. And they sought a ba`al evarim [lit. master of limbs], that is, someone who has large limbs and nurses himself to grow his limbs (that is, the members of the body), for since he has big limbs he has, after all, a larger portion in the world because he takes up more space in the world. So this man is closer to the purpose because the purpose is, after all, to grow the limbs; therefore such a person ought to be a king. They went and found a tall man (which is called a veynger [Yid.]); they were pleased by him, because he has, after all, large limbs and is at the goal. They accepted him as a king and they sought a land conducive to this and they went and settled there."

    Rabbi Nachman from Breslev "The Prayer leader":
    https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Translation:Tales_of_Rabbi_Nachman/12

    י.ד.

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

  37. Watching this video of Bourdain and his then-wife is interesting in light of subsequent events.

    He carries on too much in a fawning way about her ass-kicking machismo, and again, I just don’t get the attraction. It seems to me to be like being married to a midget wrestler.

    ice hole

    June 12, 2018 at EDT am

    • With respect to the dead and all that I find this (former) couple to be full of sh*t. He is a fawning puppy gloating over how his wife can, supposedly, beat up anyone in the restaurant (including himself). She a narcissist clinging to the only thing she imagines makes her distinctive: being a somewhat above mediocre fighter who is indulged by her male sparring partners.

      When I first heard Bourdain had topped himself I was mildly pleased thinking it must be one of those annoying French pomo philosophers… but it turned out to be a burbling cook.

      Eli Jenkins

      June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

  38. Doesn’t matter how “alpha” you are as a guy or beautiful you are as a woman. Time will tear you down.

    As an old ‘alpha male’ you command power and respect through your wealth and accolades but you won’t attract young women looking for real relationships.

    They have more respect for themselves than getting involved with a man old enough to be their grandfather. As long as you understand that (like many skeevy wealthy men do) you’ll be happy enough.

    Or you could go with the boring path of finding and settling someone when you’re young, but i guess that’s not too easy now.

    Kaz

    June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

    • It happens though, Charlie Chaplin or Polanski, for example. You gotta have content, obviously.

      Yakov

      June 12, 2018 at EDT pm

  39. For someone whose persona was that of an urbane man of the world Bourdain was actually not very smart.

    One of the youtube scenes has him wittering on about how the proper future of mankind is miscegenation and everyone becoming brown which will end all problems – and as an aside he says the future is “Singapore”.

    This is flat out ignorant. Singapore is dominated by its Chinese majority who are extremely careful to maintain their ethnic superiority even in the face of extremely low TFRs by bringing in mainland Chinese to fill the gaps.

    The late Harry Lee was absolutely clear about this saying that in multiethnic societies ordinary politics is set aside in the eternal defense of one’s ethnic group. If the Singaporean Chinese were given the chance of recreating Singapore ab initio I doubt very much whether they would think it necessary to include Indians and Malays in numbers.

    Surely Bourdain, who I believe identified strongly as an atheist Jew, would understand this?

    Eli Jenkins

    June 12, 2018 at EDT pm


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