Lion of the Blogosphere

A SWPL feels intense guilt about killing mice

I hate to break the bad news to this intensely guilt-afflicted SWPL, but the snap traps are just as “inhumane” as anything else, because half the time the mouse only gets trapped by a leg or a tail or something like that and is still alive and wiggling around.

Maybe he should try getting a cat.

Written by Lion of the Blogosphere

December 31, 2018 at 5:07 PM

Posted in Bobos

77 Responses

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  1. The answer is not to live in New York City and instead live in a prole suburb.


    December 31, 2018 at 5:43 PM

    • The author was living in Boulder Colorado.


      January 1, 2019 at 8:39 AM

      • Very SWPL, as I understand it.



        January 1, 2019 at 1:40 PM

  2. I’m SWPL, so I can identify with this. However, at the time when illegal and legal savages are storming the country’s borders, isn’t the the time to worry about the mice.

    There is an 11:30 yoga practice to user in the new year tonight and a run in the Central Park at midnigh. This is SWPL at its best! I have to be with my mother, but otherwise I would do the yoga.

    Lion, will watching movies and taking a delight in a cop saying nigger. What would one call that?


    December 31, 2018 at 5:48 PM

  3. There are electric traps that zap the mice with a fatal shock. Those probably are the fastest and most humane kills. As for getting a cat, have you ever seen a cat catch a mouse? They generally will torment the mouse for several minutes before finishing it off.



    December 31, 2018 at 5:52 PM

    • Minutes? My cats will maim the critter enough so that it can’t escape, then they spend hours staring at it, batting it around, and chewing on it. Snakes are their favorite.


      January 1, 2019 at 7:28 AM

      • Never forget that cats are merciless, cold-blooded killers.

        And I love them.


        January 1, 2019 at 6:10 PM

  4. You shoot them with a BB gun.

    Paul Rise

    December 31, 2018 at 6:01 PM

  5. I use glue traps and they’re bad too. The mouse gets stuck and screams its little squeaky mouse scream.

    I’m conflicted, too. But I tell myself they carry disease. But they are pathetic little things, and I feel their catastrophe. It’s not right thinking but there it is.

    Fortunately my cats do most the killing, when they don’t let them go alive in the house

    Mrs Stitch

    December 31, 2018 at 7:14 PM

  6. The glue traps are much more effective than the snap traps.


    December 31, 2018 at 7:17 PM

  7. He?


    December 31, 2018 at 7:18 PM

  8. He must not feel too guilty if he still intends on killing it.


    December 31, 2018 at 7:29 PM

  9. The only way to really get rid of rodents is to eliminate their food source.

    Bowl of peanut oil

    Soda bottle and can

    Rolling Log bucket

    Execution machine


    December 31, 2018 at 7:35 PM

  10. Maybe it’s prole, but s real man kills mice hand to hand with a shoe.


    December 31, 2018 at 7:44 PM

  11. I’ll invent a mousetrap for SWPLs. It’ll lure the mouse with hand-made goat cheese, and instead of snapping shut it’ll play a tape-recorded message from Ta-Nahisi Coates about how mice need to be aware of their privilege over other rodents.


    December 31, 2018 at 8:22 PM

    • A liberal mouse trap would be one where you encourage the mouse to move into your neighbour’s house, whilst you tearfully admonish your neighbours that the mouse only wants a better life for himself and his family.

      Prolier Than Thou

      January 1, 2019 at 2:59 AM

      • That is actually a literal description of what my neighbor did to me. She’s a pussy-hat wearer.


        January 1, 2019 at 1:10 PM

      • “There are mice in holes who have got pups who are worried about where they are going to get their next piece of cheese from. And they are going to come to the your house, if they think they can gnaw holes in your walls. That’s a simple fact. And they’re willing to scurry across several feet of your basement to do burrowing that some humans won’t do. And we’ve got to respect that, it seems like to me, and treat those mice with respect.”

        “As much as the loss of your intact home would be a tragedy, the loss of animal diversity would be a greater tragedy.”



        January 1, 2019 at 8:55 PM

      • “A liberal mouse trap would be one where you encourage the mouse to move into your neighbour’s house, whilst you tearfully admonish your neighbours that the mouse only wants a better life for himself and his family.”

        needs a like button


        January 2, 2019 at 10:45 AM

    • That’s a good one!

      We should also be respectful of the fact that some mice are gender non-binary.


      January 1, 2019 at 8:40 AM

  12. What a beautiful SWPL event!

    Mates, happy New Year!


    December 31, 2018 at 9:11 PM

  13. I’m no fan of war but this is what you get when the veterans of real conflicts die out. In the 80s no self respecting male would make a comment like this for fear of rebuke from an oldster who’d seen half his buddies die in front of him. Here’s a portion of Patton’s speech to the Third Army. It appears Patton understood the utility of eugenics:

    “Each man must think not only of himself, but think of his buddy fighting alongside him. We don’t want yellow cowards in the army. They should be killed off like flies. If not, they will go back home after the war, goddamn cowards, and breed more cowards. The brave men will breed more brave men. Kill off the goddamn cowards and we’ll have a nation of brave men.”


    December 31, 2018 at 9:17 PM

    • Well said!


      December 31, 2018 at 10:00 PM

    • If that SWPL had put his hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before had been his best friend’s face, then he would know what to do.

      Oswald Spengler

      December 31, 2018 at 10:09 PM

    • Many people think Patton was murdered. The official story is that he died after breaking his neck in a car crash in late 1945. The thing is, it was a fairly minor crash, none of the three or four other people in his official staff car were injured at all, and the car itself was repaired and went back into service. For Patton to have suffered a fatal injury was basically a one-in-a-billion chance.



      December 31, 2018 at 10:19 PM

    • Like most military officers, Patton sounds like a total tool.


      December 31, 2018 at 10:43 PM

      • Yeah, sounds like a prick to me. Also, replace “brave men” with “men who enthusiastically go to their deaths because somebody told them to.”


        January 1, 2019 at 9:29 AM

      • Patton was a genius at self promotion, and amazingly arrogant. He was really a relatively minor figure in WWII yet we still all know his name.


        January 1, 2019 at 11:32 AM

      • I just read that Omar Bradley entered the war under Patton but became Patton’s boss but no movie about Bradley that I know of.

        I never heard of General Carl Spaatz but according to wiki he was “One of the pioneers of US military aviation, Spaatz advocated the use of scientific analysis to bombing raids, and made effective use of long range fighters, tactics which helped the Allies achieve air superiority over Europe.[1]”


        January 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM

      • “I just read that Omar Bradley entered the war under Patton but became Patton’s boss but no movie about Bradley that I know of.”

        That is because Bradley was physically ugly, as well as dull, boring, plodding, and managerial. Not good movie material.


        January 2, 2019 at 12:04 PM

    • Endless wars are great given that it’s mostly red state deplorables that sign up for the military.


      January 1, 2019 at 12:11 AM

  14. SWPLs are modern-day Pharisees. I’ll bet this guy wouldn’t suffer any guilt at doxing some hapless badwhite and getting him fired from his job or ruining his livelihood over some PC offense.

    Oswald Spengler

    December 31, 2018 at 10:14 PM

  15. I recently had mice for the first time. I bought Rat X which is a food that shuts off their thirst. They get dehydrated and die. To my surprise it worked within a few days.

    Jay Fink

    December 31, 2018 at 11:18 PM

  16. I get a mouse or two in the house every few years. They try to find their way into the house when the weather gets cold. I’ve used the glue traps, but they are awful. I prefer the snappy kind. The odds of a clean kill are much greater than the 50% Lion claims. It bothers me to kill them, but I don’t think there is really an alternative.

    December 31, 2018 at 11:44 PM

    • I’ve used both glue and snap traps. The snap traps had a high failure rate not by failing to kill the mouse but by being ‘ignited’ before the mouse was in a position to be caught. Just jostling these traps slightly will set them off. We had two live catches but one was when we caught two mice in one trap. One was killed the other just stuck.

      Glue traps work well but all kinds of other things can get stuck on them like socks, dropped writing utensils, and floor mats.


      January 1, 2019 at 7:52 AM

  17. A great magic trick is to grab mice and give them a quick squeeze. The “magic” happens when their eyes pop out. Don’t grab a rat, though. Rats bite.


    January 1, 2019 at 12:27 AM

    • Haha, that’s gross but funny.

      But good luck grabbing a wild mouse. They can jump like two feet in the time it takes to blink.


      January 1, 2019 at 9:55 AM

  18. Now imagine that guy in the FBI:

    “This is a guest post from my friend and long time Federal Law Enforcement officer, John Hearne. John is a gifted instructor and skilled tactician. In this post, he reviews a book written by a guy who quit the FBI after a couple years of service. Things seem to keep getting progressively worse. These are the types of candidates we are seeing in all fields of police work these days.”

    “The author struggles to reconcile his naive world view with the reality he faces when he’s assigned to the violent crime squad in San Diego, CA. For instance, his first arrest involves picking up someone being released from a county jail for a Federal human trafficking warrant. The author feels guilty for re-imprisoning a guy who thought he was getting out. He downplays the significance of the human trafficking charge and seems to legitimately feel bad.”

    “The author decides to leave after less than two years because the job is too hard on his home life. Apparently, he didn’t know that he’d have to work long days and be on-call for certain weekends. Despite being well published and high for law enforcement across the nation, he complains about his “modest” salary and how it doesn’t let him live in the manner to which he’s accustomed.

    I’m convinced that he realized he could not handle what was required of him and opted out (which I can respect). I think his adamant support of a border wall shows an awareness that evil exists but his inability to internalize the ability to confront evil drives him away. The amount of cognitive dissonance this whole experience engenders is amazing. He’s terrified about the evil that lurks out there but is unable to deal with it himself and maintains a deep suspicion of those who can.”


    January 1, 2019 at 12:31 AM

    • I come from a family where they breed late in life. When I was five my grandfather, who was born in the 19th century, and survived being gassed at the Marne during WW1, taught me how to chop off chicken heads with an axe. He believed you couldn’t start toughening up boys soon enough and, like many men of his day, thought too much time around mother wasn’t a good thing. He learned this from his own grandfather who was old when my grandfather was born and who had survived a prisoner of war camp during the Civil War when he was quite young. My grandfather downplayed the Marne thinking it easy going compared to what his grandfather went through.

      As a kid I fully expected to be drafted but that never happened, we got rid of the draft. I wonder how Johnny Sensitive would view the world if he’d grown up assuming he’d someday be called upon to do something worse than cutting off chicken heads or killing mice?


      January 1, 2019 at 1:17 AM

    • I may look at that review later, but so far the guy who quit the FBI sounds sympathetic and smart.

      No way FBI agents make great money. Good, but not great.

      Being aware of evil but uncomfortable with dealing with it is a healthy attitude. You shouldn’t be content or blase about evil, or want to be near it. Also you should be suspicious of people who can deal with evil easily. That’s a sign they’re somewhat evil, which is all right, just worth noticing.


      January 1, 2019 at 10:06 AM

      • Pretty much true. In nature, a sheepdog is a domesticated version of a wolf. The sheep-dog and the wolf occupy their positions because they are closer to each other than either is to a sheep.

        Some of my college friends became law enforcement officers. Generally, at age 19, they were regarded as bad-kids who were looking to get into trouble. I would say that they were self-aware enough to recognize their own darker tendencies, and wise enough to come up with strategies for controlling those tendencies.

        On the other hand, I knew one guy in college who was such a goody-two-shoes that didn’t want people watching R-rated movies in his dorm room. He became an Air Force Chaplin. It’s a good thing he never became a police officer. He would have made Barney Fife look like Charles Bronson.

        By the time I graduated from college, I had figured out that police spend a large part of their lives dealing with the worst people in society. Essentially, if you’re in law enforcement, and you’re not constantly spending time around a-holes, you’re not doing your job.

        On the occasions when police deal with otherwise respectable citizens, it’s frequently when the citizen is at their very worst. Police are lied to multiple times on a daily basis. This severely damages their ability to trust others. It’s an occupational hazard that they start to come home and interrogate their own family trying to find lies.

        Sure, a sheepdog is individually more dangerous than a sheep. Occasionally a sheepdog will do something bad that a sheep wouldn’t be capable of. Still, sheepdogs are an essentially beneficent force, and should be regarded as such.


        January 2, 2019 at 10:43 AM

  19. Say a mildly provocative thing about a lesbian, Muslim or Jew and the whole country goes into an uproar, but torture a sentient being to death and as long as it’s not dog, cat or human and it’s A okay. That’s where where America is right now.


    January 1, 2019 at 5:01 AM

    • Torturing sentient beings is a dramatic and inaccurate way to describe killing pests.


      January 1, 2019 at 12:27 PM

  20. I live in a countryside and every late summer to winter I have to deal with an invasion of field pests. Dozens of them. They bite everything soft enough (paper, plastic, polystyrene, cables, …). Few also get into the house.
    The only effective way of dealing with them is a poison. But EU is half way banning the poison for – as always – some idiotic pseudo-reason. Since 2018, amount of acting compounds in poisoned food has been lowered, to be banned entirely in few years. Health and safety be damned.

    PS: Welcome censorship black hole.


    January 1, 2019 at 5:49 AM

  21. The natural way is for the cat to eat the mouse. The mouse is a thief and the cat needs protein. The whole affair is conducted on their level and the man doesn’t need to be involved and grossed out. When you pet a cute cat, do you think of how many mice she ate? Nobody does, not even a SWPL. The problem is that there is no cat to eat mice. The natural cycle is disturbed so SWPL start agonizing over the mice because they are acting like cats, which they evolved from. Having said that, I repeat what I’ve being saying for a long time: PETA and all these animal lovers are Nazis because they care about animals more tah they care about people, they have perverted morality.


    January 1, 2019 at 7:58 AM

  22. Here’s a list of some diseases carried by mice and rats:

    hanta virus
    lymphocytic choriomeningitis
    rat-bite fever

    They’re not “cute,” they’re dangerous. Best to get rid of them.

    Black Death

    January 1, 2019 at 8:23 AM

  23. A SWPL killing a mouse sounds like an Unprincipled Exception. He should just learn to share his house with mice.


    January 1, 2019 at 8:35 AM

  24. I think mice are cute. But not in my apartment please.

    They carry disease.

    And having food in your house has nothing to do with mice. A tiny little thing like that we’ll always be able to find a crumb. Always keep a clean apartment, that keeps insects at bay, and is civilized, but mice have an irresistible urge to poke their little noses through holes.

    The only way to keep your home, work space , or apartment free of rodents is to plug up every means of access. So said my exterminator, and he was right.


    January 1, 2019 at 8:38 AM

    • This is true! Even a few crumbs are a feast to a mouse. They also love feathers (I assume for nests?). We kept finding piles of feathers in the living room drawn out of the down cushions on the sofa. We blamed the toddler until we realized it was happening while he was asleep. eek! We threw out all the down cushions and the mouse activity in our house has plummeted.

      It was difficult to figure out what they were eating. Despite their small stature they were able to drag chicken bones long distances from the trash. Other times when the kids accidentally left out whole plates of food it would be untouched.

      We had a bad pantry moth infestation some years back and they had strange appetites too. In the same cabinet a bag of cereal would be infested but pancake mix untouched. We got rid of the moths with pheromone scented glue traps and keeping anything grain based in airtight containers.


      January 1, 2019 at 1:44 PM

      • this may sound disgusting, but it’s really not. If you have a problem with vermin, I would suggest that you put your garbage in your refrigerator overnight. Then throw it out the next day.


        January 1, 2019 at 10:02 PM

    • In other words, you build them out. Which is easier said than done, as mice can get through extremely tiny openings thanks to their flexible rib cages.



      January 1, 2019 at 1:44 PM

      • It is difficult. But they do have certain places and spaces.
        in my case, we knew that they were coming under the sink from the slob next door. So they really plugged up those holes pretty well.
        Another place was the baseboards outside my door. A sharp-eyed exterminator saw the mouse droppings. I would have thought they were just flecks of dust.
        He plugged up all those spaces and I haven’t had any mice since.


        January 1, 2019 at 10:04 PM

  25. When my wife lived in a group house, before we were married, the go-to method for rodent elimination was… the vacuum cleaner. Take the attachment off the end and suck Mickey right into the pipe. Sure, Mickey gets mangled in the process, but the girls didn’t see that happening, and most important of all, they didn’t have to touch the mouse.


    January 1, 2019 at 9:45 AM

    • I do that with water bugs.


      January 1, 2019 at 1:11 PM

  26. I trust everyone is familiar with Monty Python’s “Rat Recipes”…


    January 1, 2019 at 9:48 AM

    • I once saw a dead rat with its guts spilled apparently rolled over by a car while it was scurrying on the road.

      Ok, what, who's this again?

      January 1, 2019 at 1:02 PM

  27. I accidentally discovered a new humane means of killing mice when I left a coffee mug in my car a few weeks ago. I glanced in and noticed something fuzzy atop the now frozen coffee? Some type of freezer burn like ice formation? No, the top of a dead mouse. The mouse took refuge in the lukewarm coffee, fell fast asleep and died in peace.

    Well, either that or he got stuck inside the mug, and spent his last moments frantically trying to climb up the slippery sides. How he got in my car is the other mystery.


    January 1, 2019 at 11:46 AM

    • Thanks for the strange story, but that is revolting. I would be tempted to throw away the mug.


      January 1, 2019 at 12:36 PM

  28. Fidel Castro speeches.

    The Old Libertarian

    January 1, 2019 at 1:06 PM

  29. Mice only want to stay around to learn about value transference. Once you teach them about it, they’re gone.

    maryk (the g-loaded guidette)

    January 1, 2019 at 1:33 PM

  30. The fastest way to kill a mouse is by hitting it with a heavy object (e.g. a shovel.) The first time I did it, I felt bad. I killed more mice later and it felt no different than killing a mosquito.
    This is also a humane way as they die instantly.


    January 1, 2019 at 1:43 PM

  31. Lion, or some other NYC commenter?

    Why is Astoria, Queens, the Montréal of New York City? It’s considered the coolest neighborhood for SWPLs, even overtaking Manhattan and Williamsburg.

    While Montréal is French, Astoria is trademarked as a Greek neighborhood.

    Could it be that French and Greek neighborhoods are more welcoming to diverse high culture and better at it than the Anglo Saxon – haughty sh!tholes of liberalism?

    Interestingly, blacks do not feel welcome in Astoria like other liberal areas.

    It turns out that old school, Greek Landlords refuse to rent to blacks and Hispanics are the only dominant NAM group doing any low skilled work. Furthermore, there just aren’t many NYCHA public housing projects.

    Ok, what, who's this again?

    January 1, 2019 at 2:34 PM

    • I have not heard about Astoria being cool or hip.

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      January 1, 2019 at 9:52 PM

      • Me neither, but that’s what some of the residents who live there tell me. It’s a multicult hipsterville that intersects with Greek Cafes, playgrounds for SWPL kids, and everything is at your fingertips.

        Unlike Brooklyn and Manhattan, Hispanics who live in Queens are more Mestizo based, and not the usual rowdy Dominican or sometimes Puerto Rican.

        And one last thing, blacks aren’t a common sighting, which is the most important thing. Perhaps another reason why its rents are lower than the areas of SWPL Brooklyn, where many blacks are nearby.

        Ok, what, who's this again?

        January 1, 2019 at 10:32 PM

      • Furthermore, what separates successful, burgeoning, White ethnic gentiles like the Greeks vs WASP oriented White gentiles/Jews is that the later group tend to lean into pathological status signalling, creating exclusive, haughty and unwelcoming neighborhoods.

        Ok, what, who's this again?

        January 1, 2019 at 10:41 PM

      • From what I gather it’s a decent if not precisely trendy ‘hood, which benefit from easy access to Midtown. Not much of a Greek character anymore.



        January 1, 2019 at 10:57 PM

    • What I don’t get is why the hipsters, even when living with a girl, are so filthy? I had a service call there recently. The landlord was Greek and loaded, the tenants where two hipster couples in a tiny 2 bedroom apartment paying $2,400. Nice SWPL, but filthy like real runts. Never, ever have I lived in such squalor. So I’m talking to this SWPL and turns out that he has a degree in economics, or so he says, but works as a programmer, which on closer inquiry turns out to be data entry. The Greek landlord is a plumber. He should raise their rent for being so filthy.


      January 2, 2019 at 1:30 AM

      • Regarding Greek proles, they seem to be a class by themselves. They don’t have the stigma of the Italian guidos and are just as successful as the professional Jews without a WASP attitude.

        Anglo Saxon, SWPLs are pretty much a useless, parasitic bunch, bent on virtue signalling and frivolous consumption. They also have no culture.

        Ok, what, who's this again?

        January 2, 2019 at 9:24 AM

  32. I had a mouse problem in an apartment I lived in years ago. I tried all manner of traps and determined that the best mouse trap was a live mouse trap where the mouse walks in and tips it past it’s balance point and it tips and the door closes. Then I’d take the mouse outside and launch it at the ground as hard as possible to dispatch it. So I was directly killing the mouse. I figured I was doing myself and my neighbors a favor.

    I eradicated the mice after some persistence too.


    January 1, 2019 at 6:00 PM

  33. Goodness you people are vicious, “Catcha 2 Piece Humane Smart Mouse Trap Live Catch and Release” let the poor little mouse live in the country

    Karl Hungus of Assisi

    January 1, 2019 at 7:50 PM

  34. Every time you kill a mouse, IQ of its population goes up a notch.

    My 2¢

    January 1, 2019 at 10:23 PM

  35. MEH 0910

    January 2, 2019 at 10:56 AM

    • Amy Watson makes unfounded claims about James Watson. Using the word unfounded is easy.


      January 2, 2019 at 11:52 AM

    • In 2007, when the Nobel-winning biologist James D. Watson’s view that blacks were less intelligent than whites was first reported, he was on a tour to promote his book, “Avoid Boring People: Lessons from a Life in Science.”

      A line from the book explained the basis for his beliefs: “There is no firm reason to anticipate that the intellectual capacities of peoples geographically separated in their evolution should prove to have evolved identically,” Dr. Watson wrote.

      In other words, he was suggesting that evolution may not have acted upon cognitive traits in African populations the same way it did in populations that left Africa.
      Confusion among nonscientists over recent advances that show the ways evolution has shaped population differences is one reason I’ve been compelled to return to this subject in my recent reporting.

      The internet is teeming with people determined to use science as proof of racial hierarchy. There is no existing genetic evidence to support the view that blacks are less intelligent than whites. But the argument, which rests on data from IQ-type tests that show lower average scores among blacks, persists.

      In a widely-read Times Op-Ed last spring, the prominent human geneticist David Reich, of Harvard, argued that geneticists have underplayed the degree to which human populations are likely to have genetic differences.

      But it’s the different environments — things like family wealth, access to education, nutrition, and living in a racist society — inhabited by black and white Americans that has led most scientists to believe that IQ differences arise from nongenetic causes. And, since environments impact the way genes get expressed, and there’s no way to equalize the environment — except to fix racism — there’s no way to do a controlled experiment.

      MEH 0910

      January 6, 2019 at 11:19 AM

  36. Wonder what the author thinks of this?


    January 2, 2019 at 11:50 AM

  37. Most people feel bad about killing a mouse they just don’t signal about it. I occasionally have them in my office and use glue traps. It’s an unfortunate way to kill them because they get stuck while still alive and probably suffocate in the garbage bag. The most merciful way would be to kill them with one blow but that grosses me out so I let them suffer.

    If one wishes to display how much they care about mouse lives only principled thing is to allow them to share a house.


    January 7, 2019 at 6:31 AM

    • “If one wishes to display how much they care about mouse lives only principled thing is to allow them to share a house.”

      They would breed, and there would be more and more of them, and they’d be all over the place, at best they’d get into all of your food, at worst you’d catch disease from them. No thanks!

      Lion of the Blogosphere

      January 7, 2019 at 7:56 AM

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